Reality Check

It's kind of sad to wake up one day and realize, that you are almost 30, and you have absolutely nothing to show for it. To come to the realization that the last real relationship you were in, you were barely 19. So when it comes down to the huge scheme of things - you've never actually been in an actual relationship. So the 8 years of your life that you spent with this guy or that guy has actually messed you up quite a bit. You are what is to be considered, emotionally unavailable! Your perspective on what a real relationship is so misconstrued, that it sends you into a spiral of emotions just thinking about how f'd up you are.
6 months ago I remember explaining to someone, that I had never been on a real date. And with the shock that he had, I was kind of held-back. Now I look at it, it really is peculiar that someone my age has never been on a real date. I'm almost 30 and it's sad to know that I've never been asked on a date. I've never had the excitement of getting dressed up and glamoured to go out on the town, with a really cool guy. I've never been asked to go to "dinner and a movie." I've never experienced one of the most simple of pleasures, one gets to experience. I've never been courted.
Now, as I approach my third decade in life, I have no wedding ring, (with no chance of one in the future) no kids, no real huge career jump, to show for it. My existence in the world, really has made no impact. My friends are embracing all of life's joys. Some are married, some have kids, others have wonderful careers. I'm nothing like them - I've helped none of them get to where they are, they are there because they have the little thing about them, that made God, give them a chance.  What do I have to show for myself? Nothing!
I'm a crazy, old, fat, lady - who own's her own home, with her pets; she works a middle-class job, for low-class pay, struggling to make ends meet, while her high-class career drains her of whatever free time, or extra cash she has.